TROIS COULEURS

1
They sleep close to each other of the four poster bed
Deepti, aware of Mr. Walia's scent and his tousled dark hair
Nestling against her right shoulder that she holds very still
So as not to awaken him
She keeps glancing at him-
A slim turn on, barefoot in his drawstring trackpants, heavy stubble and slightly dribbling mouth
She carefully moves his right arm
That is wrapped around her (the other close to her right breast);
And gets up on tiptoes
She isn't wearing anything yet
In the kitchen, she tries not to dwell upon the tattoo on her right forearm
Only visible between her bangles, now that her loose nightgown has been rolled up at the sleeves
While straining the morning tea into the Pearlpet flask
The steam rises lazily from the kettle
Splaying cardamom on the kitchen walls
And Carmel college...
She had first met him during those days
Those days of tomfoolery, boredom, lethargy and high summer, blue rains
Which carried them all blissfully throughout the three years
Or, she admits ruefully, it might have been
Just him
The tattoo too, a product of a foolish summer on Candolim beach
Although a lot of it had to do with what went on between them
“This is art baby”,
She had told her mother, in low slung jeans
Today, she has trouble explaining it to Gubloo
She has received the invitation, only yesterday
She had recognized at once
The unmistakable handwriting on the envelope
She had guessed at once
The contents inside....
Today, Deepti's awake at dawn, earlier than usual
She hates these days, when she wakes up having dreamt of him
She decides she will make Mr. Walia some french toast to go with the tea
And then she must pick what to wear in the evening....
2
Neeta can't seem to feel her body, though she knows it's probably there
She hasn't been able to move her car an inch in the last seventeen minutes
She's running late now for the marketing seminar
Around her, an ocean of people and around them, another ocean
The city like a brain's neural network
The people blinking like corpuscles
Eyes closed and moving lips,
She memorizes the slides for the eleventh time
Her hair, colored auburn, parted on the right,
That she holds away from her face to look at the printouts on the front seat, from time to time;
This is so not what she wanted to be
She tries to see the beauty in haggard people and blaring horns
Because she knows she's different
A thin line sets her apart from her colleagues
She keeps Nabokov in her desk drawer
After all
Often during board meetings,
She's either in the middle of a sentence in Howard's End
Or in one of Leonard's midwestern landscapes
Some afternoons, she wants to just lie down on a pavement
And go to sleep
But she can almost see her own self, fifteen minutes from now,
Bent over mineral water bottles and laptop screens in conference rooms
It's at moments like this that she feels that she should've had a peg leg
Then it would've been enough to just live
Without it, she's supposed to make something
Of her thirty one year old life
She watches the time on her left wrist
She can't help noticing the faint scar besides it
It's been too long
Still, it's a reminder
That although she's a sexy, successful woman today
She's the same woman who once tried to die and failed at it
But she's a survivor
Time had stopped there
Not here
The second hand of the watch is still parading on its dreamy dial.
It's an Omega afterall
3
Susan D'Souza feels the lump on her stomach
Her electric blue gown hides it rather well
Just one hour remains before the dinner
Her lips curve into a smile in the mirror
Her laugh lines only faintly visible
She looks like a woman of sorrows
And her breaths are becoming shorter
He isn't here yet
She wants to say, “Give me some space
So that I can reach you”
Hot chocolate at Keventer's,
Old Tintins rediscovered,
Lamb Curry at Dada Boudi,
Duran Duran on the walkman,
Sunrise from the Bodega Bay,
Dostoevsky around her neck,
And his endings
She doesn't want anything else today....
….
It is Susan who recognizes Deepti first
The girl who didn't look beautiful
Until she smiled
The dimple like a tear running down her cheek
Her face, coarsely handsome than really pretty
He has still not come
Is he still looking for his navy blue suit?
The waiters serve them more food for thought in the meanwhile
Deepti nudges Susan with her right elbow, almost spilling her Pinacolada
In another corner of the room, they watch the girl with the prose-like poise
The girl with the dark circles
The girl with the flat top hair
The girl with the chipped front tooth
The girl with another man
It was always only her eyes


It is the time of the night when a new day is about to begin
It is the 26th of November
It is time